oh, super unfun, wary of the spontaneous me

though a cute indie boy asked me not more than 25 minutes ago to walk home and make out, I avoided the situation and did my very best to talk him out of it. now, I know that there is a bit of caution that we all should take in life...but do I amplify caution and cause myself to miss out on some fun experiences? (mind you, I'm saying this in general, not just specifically regarding not making out with some random cute guy.) I've always been one to develop a plan or some idea of how I want things to be framed. what happens when a situation pops up that doesn't fit my predesigned scope? seemingly (and maybe this isn't totally true, but it seems to have some great weight), I force it out of my realm so that it doesn't interfere with how I think things should be. so, with this specific situation, I was super wary of bringing someone I didn't know home and I didn't really know if this is something that is all that common. am I really that stiff and boring? even with my psuedo resolution to be a bit more bold, I have, in my first instance to seize the day, if you will, shirked away from it.

good god, even I bore me. even if others tell me that I'm adorable.