three weeks down...

the ellipsis in the title of this post is to note that, while three weeks of the first semester are 'done,' there are many weeks ahead. if all weeks are as exhausting as this one, in which I spent a good deal of energy battling demons and trying not to want to give up, then this is going to be a long program. the ph.d. gig makes me feel uncertain about so many things in my life and about myself. it forces me to question just how intelligent I am, what my limits are (emotionally, intellectually, physcially), and the shape that I want to bring to my life. I know that I am capable of doing this, but I sometimes wonder when someone says 'when.'

it's going to be three busy years until I finish prelims.